Let’s start at the beginning!
Congratulations! Your wife/partner is pregnant. You’re going to be a dad. What does that mean to you? How do you feel?
In our case, we decided that too many people try to splash the news about, so that everyone knows. Hang on, a baby is your own issue and only yours. Don’t feel pressured to start telling everyone just because you think you should. Tell them when you’re ready. Indeed, that applies to any situation you’ll find yourself in. Run this show yourself. So we kept things quiet and let the news spread slowly.
M. was great. The entire time. It’s something we can’t imagine – a little “thing” inside us, growing, growing, taking away resources you used to have for yourself. As an expectant Dad, you need to be supportive. If she’s tired, then help out. (You mean you DON’T already help around the house???) She will sleep a lot, and also SNORE (louder than you imagined possible!). OK, don’t complain (remember WHY this is happening?!), be supportive.
As M. is small in stature, I eventually had to take over the driving (we have only one car). But hey, that offered new insights. You chaps ever been to a gynaecologist before? Why not? OK, it’s not about us, but if you’re in this as a team, then you jump over your shadow and jolly well go along. You’ll learn a lot about what she’s going through, you will see the ultrasound pics of your little one growing. It’s all pretty exciting. New life. And you’re a part of it!
Re eating. Yep, you’ll have heard about hunger pangs and cravings for weirdo things. If they happen, go along with it. She’s got a cocktail of hormones and emotions right now we can’t (and don’t want to) imagine. In M.’s case, it was brezels and then unsalted nuts (oh and raspberries, which was a bit of luck, as it was the summer and they were in season). But it’s all in a good cause, right? So you tolerate the grapefruit segments with mustard! You don’t have to eat it after all.
I’ll close this post with a mantra to remember, even after bubbakins is born: “This is just a phase!”. You’ll hear that over and over!